Finding Beauty in Identity, Not Culture
By Jillian Noel
It’s been nearly ten years since I’ve seen my natural hair color. As I brushed my hair one evening, I found a new appreciation for its brown color highlighted gold from the summer sun. The same color I used to despise and change frequently. From the time I was fourteen, I spent my time seeking the right style, hair and makeup combination. What I chose varied depending on who I spent the most time with or who I was trying to impress. This meant I went from sporty to preppy then through an extensive goth phase until I finally arrived upon an existential crisis at the ripe age of twenty-four. I didn’t know who I was anymore. All the years of being a chameleon caught up with me and I was faced with a question, “What do I really like?”
Now as a wife and mother, I feel called to answer the question for the current generation of women who are influenced by an algorithm and encouraged to do the same thing I did. Beginning with prayer, scripture, and a heavy assessment of my closet, I began to see a pattern. It revealed a game that is being played in the culture. It’s a game that no one wins. A method of subconsciously challenging what we know to be true of ourselves and the innate dignity intertwined in our femininity.
As you scroll through any social media, you are bombarded with imagery, advertisements, and personalized posts depicting the epitome of beauty, customized to your skin tone or your preferred style choices. The world finds its source in the right makeup, the ideal body fat ratio, and the latest hair trends. Keeping up a constant loop of dissatisfaction has become the name of the game.
We have the joy of not only experiencing the pressure to conform but being chased by it. It doesn’t matter if you’re postpartum, a dedicated gym goer, or content where you are. One wrong Google search can land you in a world of supplements and protein powders. This paints a picture of how we have forfeited the Lord’s design for a counterfeit by detaching from our identity, and it’s a bleak one at that. A life spent in this loop is one that slowly deteriorates your soul.
As it says in Matthew 10:30-31, “Even all the hairs of your head are counted. So do not be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.” It’s not as if when we were created, He just threw some genetics together and hoped for the best, even each hair was intentional.
In Jeremiah 1:5 He reinforces, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I dedicated you, a prophet to the nations I appointed you.” Your identity was set in stone long before foundation match existed. It is pivotal enough that it prophesies in its own way for future generations, directly influencing how they see themselves. It is this loving language that prompts reflection:
“What does it mean to be a temple of the Holy Spirit?”
“How do I honor that intentionality as His beautiful creation?”
Hidden within the cultural obsession is a call to action. It gives us an opportunity instead to turn to the Heavenly Father to ask, “How do you feel about me Lord?” Then to listen to His answer and lean into reflection on it. We do not win the game by following the culture and its every whim, but by resting in the identity of being a daughter of God. This identity is rooted in the fibers of our being.
It’s in the way we carry life, how we embody the image of Christ on Earth, as well as in the gifts and talents we are meant to share with the world. The Proverbs 31 woman is even reminded that beauty fades, but the woman who fears the Lord is to be praised (31:30).
So before reaching for the next box of hair dye or a more expensive mascara, ask yourself if you’re reaching for something that glorifies His design or if it’s something that engages the cycle of dissatisfaction. Beginning to reflect on the intentions of His plan helps to reveal the truth among the lies because at the end of the day, the One who created you has the best image of you. Hair once thought of as dull or muddy might suddenly begin to reflect something more intricate and engage you in the natural beauty you are.
